Walking into a restaurant in San Antonio, I thought, I hope this is what heaven looks like. I didn't know that's what I wanted, but now that I've seen it, I hope heaven is an all-night Mexican eatery with sassy, beautiful waitresses, mariachi bands, a bakery, and all the tortilla chips you can eat. If I had to give it a genre, a type, I would say Gothic Mexican. Maybe Gothic Mexican plus Christmas lights. You could be very happy in a place like this.
Welcome to Mi Tierra. It's located in the heart of El Mercado -- Market Square. When you are done shopping for brightly colored pottery frogs and turquoise jewelry, you can go there like I did. Maybe you will go there three times like I did, too. I took these pictures.
The first time we were just tourists. My son was behind me and when we walked in he said, "Oh...nuns." Nuns selling jewelry.
Look, I'm easily impressed. I am. I suffer fools and I watch bad tv. I think everything and everyone has a story, but some stories are better than others and in a town of many, many Mexican restaurants, the one with the baby wreath will always get my vote for "Best of San Antonio". You can't see him because I didn't take his picture, but there was a man there, a live mannequin, who scared my mother-in-law. He was a cross between James Brown, Michael Jackson and Elvis Presley. Now you're starting to see why this looks like heaven.
The second time we went in at the END of our shopping and we settled in the dark, ornate bar with the heavy furniture and the vintage mariachi outfits in glass cases. The mariachi waiter tried to upsell me into a blue margarita in honor of the Cowboys being in town, but I just got the traditional for $5.95.
The third time we visited is because my family loves me and we had dinner. My quesadilla was tasty, fluffier in texture than most quesadillas, but I have to say -- I was distracted. Yes, there were TWO mariachi bands floating around. Yes, that is a large portrait of Bill Clinton running with a Mi Tierra t-shirt on. He must've eaten there before he went vegan. Yes, that is a shark in the background. The place is huge, and most of the women are dressed for a special occasion. There are flowers behind ears, and everyone looks good in Christmas lights.
Oh, Mi Tierra, save a table for me. I'll be back for that blue margarita.