Saturday, July 28, 2012

1 Day to Edinburgh....finishing the list

Preparing for Airport Security

print boarding passes
weigh your big ass bag

Over a year ago, in a gesture of optimism (and probably procrastination), I added a feature to my Google homepage.  I added a little square that showed me a different picture from Edinburgh throughout the day.  Castles, girls dancing, big views. Just the act of doing that was supposed to help me GET to those places.  That's all kooked up, right?  Bananas, yea?  I also added one below it of New York City (that was from instant-cameras around the city, so those are more like shots of people crossing the street).    

I believe, as usual, that I have overpacked.  Right now, it ALL seems necessary.  Must get scale and see if bag is over 50 pounds. 

pack medicine
This morning, as there is nothing left but packing toiletries, making extra-love to the cat, and finishing this list before I set off on a month-long trip to perform my show at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe, I have to give those little scrolling shots a shout out.  I should be in Scotland by lunch tomorrow.  I plan to pop an Ambien somewhere in the air between Chicago and London.  Three weeks ago I was in New York with my play.  While clicking through that homepage earlier this week on the way to my gmail, I got a new email -- an invitation to go back to New York for three performances in October at an arts festival. Was it the scrolling shots?

fix hem on dress
download songs for show on iphone

buy bra
I bought a bra at Belks yesterday.  The saleslady exclaimed, "Oh!  This one fits like a glove!" I need a new bra, not a new glove, but SOLD.  I have developed the uncanny ability to work my trip into almost ANY conversation ("Yes, beans and rice, no peppers, yes sour cream, I'm going to Scotland, yes guac"), so as our transaction ended with how I needed to remember my Bra & Panty Club Card next time and bring my receipt and she would catch me up she asked if she could go with me to Scotland.  Like most people I talk to, she says she has ALWAYS wanted to go to Scotland.  What makes me so lucky?  What really good piece of advice do I have to make this happen?

Update Google homepage. 

call bank
I've called the bank to say I'm finally going somewhere interesting, so don't card block me when I try to buy haggis.  

I need to text my sister one more time while it's easy.  

do Tracy Anderson dvd
I was hoping to work out one more time.  I keep picturing Europeans seeing my flabby arms and saying, "Look, they don't even try." 

Straighten the basement
Screw it.  Right before a trip, there's always a certain amount of straightening I do.  A friend says she does this, too, so that she comes back to a neat house.  I do it in case I die.  I don't want my sister and mother-in-law and best friends to have a hard time finding things (like surfaces). 

thank Kate

On Thursday night, my friend, Kate, threw a Bon Voyage party for me.  During the evening, there were two "reverse striptease" performances by my friends that I will not soon forget.  When the whole crowd is chanting, "Put it on, Put it on", you know you're in a dirty place.  My friends came and they overpaid me for tshirts and helped me switch gears into full-on Dirty Barbie machine.  At this point, it's hard to express the level of gratitude I feel without ruining any street cred I have left, so I'll just say I'm a very lucky lady and I know it. 

Write a blogpost
Will write soon from Edinburgh!  xo, deedee

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Dirty Barbie Does DC...Again!

Elizabeth (Dirty Barbie's publicist) here again! I'm updating you on DeeDee's behalf as I suspect she's holed up in her adorable light-filled office, working with an exhaustion-fueled frenzy. Better yet, maybe she's sleeping. Girlfriend's been running hard.

Anyway, GOOD NEWS for every DeeDee-lover in DC. After an uber-successful NYC premier (check out this review and this review and let's all have a drink),  Dirty Barbie will pack her bags once again. She's headed to DC's The Corner Store for a two-day reprise of her childhood tales--her last performances before the Edinburgh Fringe!

The Corner Store, a nonprofit arts center on 9th and S. Carolina SE, hosted Dirty Barbie earlier this year.   They're totally jazzed to relive the baby dolls, Nutter Butters and tantrums with "a return engagement of this hilarious and fearless performer." 

The Venue which Cannot Get Enough
If you, like The Corner Store, can't get enough of the Dirty Barbie goodness, or if you just want to see the show Stateside, head to DC and buckle up for this one-hour wild ride. The show performs at this Saturday, July 21st at 8PM, and Sunday, July 22nd at 4PM. Tickets are $15 in advance, $20 at the door.

Hope to see you there!

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Dirty Barbie Does NYC!

Hey NYC readers! This is Elizabeth, Dirty Barbie's publicist, with the details of DeeDee's Big Apple performances. Her hilarious one-woman show opened last night, but you've still got time to catch it. Here's the scoop (and a sale!):

WHO: DysFUNctional Story Lovers in the Tri-State Area

WHAT: Four  Three Performances of Dirty Barbie & Other Girlhood Tales

WHERE: 59E59 Theater, located at 59 East 59th St (go figure) b/t Madison and Park Avenues

WHEN: Tonight, July 11 at 9PMThursday, July 12 at 9PMSaturday, July 14 at 9PM

WHY: Because Dirty Barbie is awesomeAlso for 59E59's East to Edinburgh festival, which features new shows en route to the Festival Fringe in August. 


MORE WORDS: A talkback will follow tonight's performance.

CHEAP BOOZE: 59E59's theater bar will offer a drink special tonight. Only $7 for their signature Aidatini!

BLOGGER BONUSTickets are normally $15 (a steal for a night out in the city), but we just received a special blogger discount code! If you're a blogger, you can get your ticket for just $10. Comment below or email me ( for details. 

See you at the show!

Thursday, July 5, 2012

59 More Shows to See

Guest post by Ray.

59 Shows to see?  OK not 59, but 16 shows to see at 59E59.

Dirty Barbie and other girlhood tales will make it's NY debut as part of the East to Edinburgh Festival at 59E59.

This is a great chance to see some wonderful shows in July, in NYC, each headed to the Edinburgh Fringe -- the world's largest theatre festival in August, in Scotland.

Here's the full details from 59E59 Theatres.

JUL 10 - JUL 29

59E59 Theaters presents

EAST TO EDINBURGH returns to 59E59 with sixteen new shows on their way to the Edinburgh Festival Fringe - catch them here, before they cross the pond!


In 1978, a mother, newly widowed, moved her family from the wide, open spaces of Wyoming to a tiny town in North Carolina. Spinning tales on scarlet fever, scotch over ice and girls gone wild, DeeDee Stewart puts the 'fun' back in dysfunctional.
  • $15 (59E59 MEMBERS $10.50) 
  • July 10, 11, 12, 14 at 9 

MICHAEL POPE IS GAY FOR PAY Pope's stranger than fiction tale of a mystery job in the Empire State Building and discovering himself to be the world's greatest phone sex operator - a rollercoaster ride of absurdity, obscenity and the true spiritual meaning of 'nothing left to lose'.$20 (59E59 MEMBERS $14) July 10, 11, 14 at 7
Buy tickets for MICHAEL POPE IS GAY FOR PAY here

LISTEN! THE RIVER A tough-talking cat, a one-eyed dog, a reluctant fiancé, his sexy betrothed and a bible-toting mother flow through this story of love, loss and new beginnings. $15 (59E59 MEMBERS $10.50) July 12, 13 at 7; July 15 at 4
Buy tickets for LISTEN! THE RIVER here

MADE FOR EACH OTHER What kind of man proposes marriage on the first date, and what kind of man says 'yes'? Gay marriage meets Alzheimer's in this uplifting and funny drama about sex, love, and the power of memory. $18 (59E59 MEMBERS $12.60) July 13, 27 at 9; July 15, 18 at 7
Buy tickets for MADE FOR EACH OTHER here

CAPTAIN FERGUSON'S SCHOOL FOR BALLOON WARFARE Inspired by true events surrounding WWI, this solo-performance chronicles the patriotism and misguided genius of U.S. Army Capt. Thomas Ferguson. $18 (59E59 MEMBERS $12.60) July 14 at 2; July 20 at 5

I HEART HAMAS: AND OTHER THINGS I'M AFRAID TO TELL YOU Join Jennifer on auditions, bad dates and across military checkpoints as she explores becoming Palestinian-ized, then politicized and eventually radicalized in this fresh, often funny, searingly honest show. $20 (59E59 MEMBERS $14) July 14 at 4; July 15 at 2

EAT $H*T: HOW OUR WASTE CAN SAVE THE WORLD The Puru plunges the depths of our constipated culture. Brown's the New Green in the show that's changing the world one flush at a time! $15 (59E59 MEMBERS $10.50) July 17 at 7; July 22 at 4

CLOONEY, COWELL, PITT AND ME: AMUSING ENCOUNTERS WITH THE A-LIST Ever wondered what the biggest stars in Hollywood are really like? Find out from the man who has met them all, in this rollicking one man show from leading British entertainment reporter Sandro Monetti. Watch the trailer here! $12 (59E59 MEMBERS $8.50) July 17, 18 at 9; July 21 at 2

DEAD MAN'S CELL PHONE A dead man! His ringing cell phone! Pulitzer Prize finalist Sarah Ruhl's Dead Man's Cell Phone takes up our mundane capacity to connect in a world a-twitter with technology. $15 (59E59 MEMBERS $10.50) July 19, 20 at 7; July 21 at 4
Buy tickets for DEAD MAN'S CELL PHONE here

DIRTY PAKI LINGERIE Sex, Religion, and Politics collide as six Pakistani-American Muslim females air their dirty lingerie... 'Breaks down stereotypes of Muslim women in America' - The Wall Street Journal $20 (59E59 MEMBERS $14) July 19, 20, 21 at 9
Buy tickets for DIRTY PAKI LINGERIE here

MOD Fab! Irreverent! Totally Groovy! Original musical rocks 59E59 Theaters. Inspired by the British pop of the early 1960s. Teen angst set against the backdrop of the Beatles' invasion of America. $20 (59E59 MEMBERS $14) July 21, 22, 26, 27, 28, 29 at 7
 Buy tickets for MOD here

A MAN FOR ALL TIMES: W.E.B. DU BOIS Martin Luther King. Remembered. Revered. W.E.B. Du Bois, a major Civil Rights Activist, largely forgotten. Pulse Theatre remedies this with this inspiring drama. $20 (59E59 MEMBERS $14) July 22 at 2; July 24, 25 at 7
Buy tickets for A MAN FOR ALL TIMES: W.E.B. DU BOIS here

TENDERPITS From the creators of FringeNYC 2009 Outstanding Solo Show Art's Heart, Tenderpits is the incredible 100% half-true story of a young wizard's immigration from the wilderness of Canada to New York City. $18 (59E59 MEMBERS $12.60) July 24, 25, 26 at 9
Buy tickets for TENDERPITS here

DEATH BOOGIE Death Boogie is a multimedia Hip Hop Poetry Musical that follows the fictional story of Victor Spartan, a blue collar worker who lives a comatose lifestyle by day and at night, hears the poetic sounds of revolution. $12 (59E59 MEMBERS $8.50) July 28 at 2
Buy tickets for DEATH BOOGIE here

VARIETIES OF RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE Inspired by a study showing that hallucinogenic mushrooms can effectively treat obsessive compulsive disorder, award-winning standup Adam Strauss embarked on a program of vigilante psychopharmacology. $12 (59E59 MEMBERS $8.50) July 28, 29 at 4 Buy tickets for  

VARIETIES OF RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE here 3 BY POE Three superb horror stories with a common theme - revenge! Cask of Amontillado and Tell Tale Heart are performed by the murderers; Hop-Frog, by Poe himself. $12 (59E59 MEMBERS $8.50) July 28 at 9; July 29 at 2
Buy tickets for 3 BY POE here

Buy Tickets for Selected Show
$12.00 (59E59 MEMBERS $8.50)
$15.00 (59E59 MEMBERS $10.50)$18.00 (59E59 MEMBERS $12.60)$20.00 (59E59 MEMBERS $14.00)

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Dirty Barbie t-shirts

Welcome to Dirty Barbie's t-shirt shop! 

Many of you have asked me..."Where can I get a t-shirt?" Well, now I can help you.  My inventory is made up of two kinds of t-shirts:

1.  Brand new white, feminine short-sleeve t-shirts.  I have these in small, medium and large.  They are 98% cotton and 2% spandex, so they hold up very well through multiple washings and they are form-fitting (yes...vavavoom).

2.  Second-hand one-of-a-kind shirts.  These have been very popular.  Two more sold today to my friends.  Once these are gone they are gone, because I only have one of each kind that I hand-picked locally (yes, kind-of like a tomato).

Here, in this video, I walk you through my inventory:

I've tried to set this up so that you can buy them online and then I can ship it to you or figure out a way to pick it up if you live in Charlottesville.  Please email me at if you have ANY problems or questions. 

Other shirts

Sunday, July 1, 2012

Talk to the Back of My Head...It's Easier this Way

as "Miller Time" for by Billy Hunt

Guest Post by Miller Murray Susen
Note from DeeDee:  I'm sharing with you today the writing of Miller Murray Susen.  Those of us who get to read her Facebook updates know what it's like to read what she writes and cry, "More, more, more!"  So, I asked her if she would give me more -- a guest post about being an actor and a mother...
I was driving my kids across town to swim team. I often bring up difficult or complicated subjects with them in the car, because they seem more comfortable telling the back of my head about their feelings--the front has all of my eye and mouth bits, after all. I had gotten my news the night before, and it seemed like as good a time as any to share it.

“So, guys!” I began in a carefully cheerful tone. “You know that play I auditioned for earlier this week?” I got a couple of muffled “Mmm”s and pressed on. “Well, you’ll never guess what? I got the part!”

I looked in the rearview mirror to gauge their reactions. Neither of them said a word, but the weary look of resignation they exchanged spoke volumes.

The first time I got cast in a play as a real, actual grown-up was 3 years ago. My son was 2, and my daughter was 5. The show was RENT, and I only had an ensemble role, but that was really all I could handle. I’d sung nothing but lullabies since 2004, danced only the late-night baby bop, acted by embodying the real-life drama queen I was born to be, but nothing more, you know, formal.

Combining the work of the play with the work of stay at home parenting was tricky. Rehearsals were 5 nights a week and I’d get home around 10:30 pm and then buzz around the house unable to come down. My son is an early riser, so sleeping time was squeezed. During the long, hazy days I volunteered at the kids’ schools, and let me tell you making blueberry muffins with eighteen 5 year olds on 5 hours of sleep is what I imagine a bad trip feels like. Coordinating a babysitting schedule of military-grade precision was also extra challenging for my wooly head, but my husband’s frequent work travel demanded it. One thing I didn’t do, that I’m sure my kids wish I had, is punt on dinner. I needed to eat before rehearsal, too, so I held the line on the homemade evening meal, which meant we had to be sitting down to eat by 6 pm, which meant I had to be prepping by 4:30, which meant I had to really be on top of the flow of the afternoons, which meant... I basically spent 3 months as a blur of quick-talking, baggy-eyed mom flesh, like an Aaron Sorkin character but with no clever quips.

I even missed being the Easter Bunny that year--our last performance was the Saturday night before Easter Sunday, and we had to strike the whole set plus make terrible decisions at the cast party, so I slept for 3 hours before stumbling down to watch the kids uncover the melty chocolate my husband had quickly stashed around the backyard. There was not enough coffee in the world to make it a happy Easter. The exhaustion was so extreme it was all I could do not to look into the joyful, chocolate-smeared face of my 5 year old and snarl, “Really? You think a huge bunny hopped around the yard last night and hid that candy? YOU REALLY THINK THAT COME ON!”

The experience of the show, though, was electrifying. I reconnected with my love of performance in a big way. For me there are not many highs higher than hollering music that makes your heart hammer to a packed house of happy people.

We as a family wound up the experience of mom doing a musical basically intact, but the house was a wreck, my nerves were shot, my relationship with my co-parent was threadbare, we were hundreds of dollars in the hole from the babysitting, and I hadn’t seen any non-theater friends for an entire season of the year. It felt so good to ease back into a schedule centered around the kids--no more sitters or hurried meals, a tidier house, and a less preoccupied mom. But. But... I told my family I wouldn’t do any more plays for a while, in recognition of how much easier our life is when I’m not trying to do my job while also working nights. But the bottom line is that I’d tasted Paris, and it was just too hard to be back on the farm full time forever.

I don’t do the performing for anyone but me. People will say things trying to make me feel better about it, like, “it’s good for your kids to see you happy,” and “pursuing something you love teaches them to do the same,” and blah well-meaning blah. But I don’t have any illusions about this--my performing really isn’t fun for them, they just tolerate it. If I cared about centering our household around them and providing gold-standard parenting, I wouldn’t do any more performing until they were out of the house. It’s just a fact.

But I love it. And I love them. And while never the twain shall meet, the twain shall co-exist as comfortably as possible for as long as we can swing it.

Miller Murray Susen has 23 first cousins on her father's side of the family. She likes a nice hummus, avocado, and sriracha sandwich. Her son is going into kindergarten in the fall, which means both of her children will be in school all day, which means she needs to get her crap collected, but... Well, it's still summer, I guess. She acts, sings, competes in triathlons, picks up after people, bakes, paints, makes beds, edits, arm wrestles, took guitar lessons for a while, and has a blog you can't read because it isn't ready yet. You can follow her on Twitter if you've nothing better to do @A_momynous.

Miller's next upcoming role will be "Diana" in the musical I LOVE YOU BECAUSE at Four County Players in Barboursville, Virginia.  It opens September 7, 2012.